....which seem to come when I have had to help Mom back to bed too many times and zip her zipper for her and find her handkerchief for the sixth time and figure out why she isn't hearing me-again, etc..... Little, petty things that are not truly that much of a hardship.
But they bring me face-to-face, over and over again in one morning, how much my dear mom has changed and lost. And how I haven't truly yet gotten used to spending my days helping her through each and every one of these little challenges and losses and confusions. And how pressing it feels to be juggling homeschooling and caregiving and the addition and everything else. And how lonely it is facing it all day after day without a friend to sympathize and remind me of my blessings and make me laugh.
I have a large-scale project ongoing to help on a physical plane-the thorough and wisely ruthless uncluttering of our home and day-to-day lives....but this rainy day (rainy days at home I love, rainy days taking Mom into town are not as cosy) I decided to go to Panera (a fast internet connection speed-what a joy!) and spend some time looking for another caregiver somewhere in the wide webby world to give me some companionship in this often lonely journey. And joy of joys I found someone. So I am sharing her wonderful blog with you, and feeling very grateful that my search was fruitful this time, after many searches that were not so.
Someone who understands can make all the difference.